Albinous

I have got a problem
with perception…
mine is plausibly flawed.
I seek purity.
There is none.
And I embody vile.

People are fooled by arrogance.
It blinds them-
whether theirs or mine.
It is armor:
shiny,
impressive,
frictionless.

Hollow.

Knowing this,
I am apart.
Being rare
doesn’t always feel good.

Not All That Riled

Groovy grey hats,
coffee,
watching roommates
kill rock monsters
(not rock lobsters, Fred).
Watching steps.
Finding the zen zone
without outside aid.
Alive, breathing freely,
and it’s seventy-three.
Could be worse.
Could be so much worse.

P-51

An airplane model-
tiny pieces
an uninteresting puzzle
informed by a picture
taken by someone else.
And it will never fly,
not like the real thing
that I’ve only seen in videos
which aren’t the real thing
but only pixels
arranged in such a way
as to make it more interesting
than it ever could be
in the (flesh?)
I’m tired of sniffing glue.

How Do You Give Up?

Seems counterintuitive
to try
but I’m not sure
human nature
allows it
passively.
I don’t know anyone
who’s actually succeeded.
Everyone wants something-
alien landings.
Revolution.
Dinner.
Toothpaste.
Liquor.
Attention.
Love.
I’d love to want nothing,
and like it.

Laid Out

A lot of things I wish I were.
Not doing this,
not that,
the other.
I wish
is a popular statement.
Mostly I’m just lazy.
Entrenched.
Dying at twenty-five.
Dishonest with myself,
but not about that.

Bet What’s In Your Wallet

Don’t let the door
hit you in the ass on the way out-
I hope you leave
a trail of tears
after I punk you.
Suck it up,
motherfucker,
suck it up-
so I robbed you.
Took your pride
in front of your kids.
That ain’t my fault.
Don’t put it on the line
for a lie,
against someone who pays rent.
Suck it up.

Bottle

Alcohol doesn’t dull the anger.
The fear.
The regret.
But I tell myself
it does, so I can
be normal.
Just
like
you.

Meningitis

If you think
I’m happy
I have to get
stabbed with a needle
full of chemicals
to prevent a disease-
you’re fucking crazy.
Thanks,
everyone who shares drinks.

House of Pain

Restless-
Can’t stay still,
Ludacris.
Ludicrous.
There’s something wrong…
tapeworm
thyroid
fucking crazy.
Do you know how it feels
to have an itch
trapezius to deltoid?
The anger shakes are back.
Nothing
is free or forever.

Blank

Simply empty
Seeking satiation tonight.
It’s a form of bloodlust,
ready to
kill and eat
kill and eat
kill and eat
all the things.
I am empty,
simply empty
and no attempts to fill
have been successful.
What fills you,
on Sunday nights,
when ravenous,
lusting,
hungry…
Simply empty.
Unfulfilled
ravenous.
Feed me.

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